On the Razor™’s Edge
The following is a recovered log from January 19th, 2023: Senior Scooter Day.
- April 1, 2023
April Fools
School Funding to go into Rebuilding the Pool
After the recent chemical spill in La Canada High School which resulted in a school cancellation on March 13, 2023, the LCUSD Governing Board has decided to demolish the pool and start rebuilding another, larger, pool.
- April 1, 2023
Biden Declares April “Green Month”: Sales Abound!
After much pressure from environmental activists, President Biden has finally responded with bold action against climate change by declaring all of April to be “Green Month”.
- April 1, 2023
BREAKING: School scraps plan to salvage AP Bio class, starts teaching cheese-based economics
After a rough year in the science department, with teachers leaving one after another, the school board finally decided this April to give up on salvaging the class. Instead, Mr. Cartnal has hand selected a new class to replace it, “Cheesenomics 101.”
- April 1, 2023
Leaked Transcript of Mr. V’s Skincare Routine
Today is THAT day of the year– The Spartan was able to access Mr. V’s latest skincare video to share with his fans. Please show lots of love by shouting, “We stan!” when you pass Mr. V in the hallways.
- April 1, 2023
The Devil’s Gate Dam Is Being Refilled
The completion of the restoration of the dam was indeed a huge accomplishment for the collection of water and preservation of wildlife in our area. But, recent reports from the Government of Los Angeles County have indicated that the dam will be refilled. Why? Simply put, it just looks stupid.
- April 1, 2023
Chemical Leak Turning the Spartans… Gay??!
LCHS students and parents alike were shocked on Monday, March 13th, when they received an emergency notification from the school administration. School was closed due to a chemical leak, and not much information beyond that was given. The reason for such was likely because the administration wanted to prevent panic amongst parents as much as possible. At least, that’s what it first seemed like… But now it’s irrefutable. LCHS has a new problem. Clearly, the chemical leak has caused students to turn gay.
- April 1, 2023
